Valentie's Day Gifts

Have you got her anything yet?
Are you struggling to get him something he'll actually like?

How much do you now about your partner (or partner-to-be)!

In NLP we talk about people being more visual or more auditory or more kinesthetic.  Of course we generalise, no one is just one or the other!  But just knowing which way your partner favours will help you choose the perfect gift!

Have you ever bought what you thought was the perfect gift - and got it completely wrong?  Maybe you based the choice on your preference, not your partner's!

Does she like to look good, is she maybe artistic and creative? Then she'll love flowers or a piece of jewellery - you could book her into a salon to get her nails done - something that she can look at will make her feel good. 

Or is she more into comfort and keeping warm? Then she's more likely to appreciate a massage at the beauty salon - or a DVD box set of her favourite show.  This lady will appreciate a hug as much as the words "I love you".   Auditories like to hear those words!

Does she love music - well that's an easy one it's a CD or concert tickets! 

Or would she really love just staying in, keeping warm and having a nice meal!

The thing is if she's into comfort and good food, jewellery will be a short lived "it's the thought that counts" present!

And of course, don't revert to chocolates if she's into keeping fit and staying slim!

For women who're more into feelings and emotions a hug and "I love you" will mean more than the most expensive red roses - but if she's very "visual" then the flowers will be a WOW.

For him the rules are the same. Visual (things that look good) auditory (things that sound good and that includes music and whispering sweet nothings!) or kinesthetic - feelings and emotions.

Not sure?  Buy flowers, gifts, "experiences" and hug and kiss and say "I love you".  Better to be safe than sorry!

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Diabetes cure

Yesterday's papers were full of headline news about a cure for diabetes.  Actually researchers have said that there could be a cure within 10 years. So maybe the key word is "could".

If you have been diagnosed with type 2 diabetes or pre-diabetes (don't change and you'll be there) then you know the cure yourself!

You need to change your eating habits, cut down on sugars in your diet and lose weight.  There is a lot of evidence that a near starvation diet for just a few months, or a very low calorie diet will cure diabetes.

So you have a choice. Starvation, low calorie or change - or wait for the miracle pill!

The point is that it is your choice. You do have a choice.  Type 2 diabetes is a choice.  All you need to do now is choose your cure!

Don't try. Do it!  Get a coach, a helper (I know a really good hypnotherapist :).  

The most important step is to change what, when, how much and why you eat. That's what I do with my clients.  It's not fast weight loss but it is easy and it does get you to the same point. Diabetes free. Now, how does that sound. How would that feel?

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smoke free or e-cigs?

I was just watching TV and the smoke free advert came on. It showed a man smoking a cigarette and the "dirty blood" going through his veins into his lungs, heart and brain. The voice-over was something like "if you knew what it did to you, you'd stop". But you still keep smoking. You turned the advert over didn't you? Flicked channels?

Today the newspapers are saying that e-cigs will be banned for under 18s. Some are saying why bother? Under 18s aren't taking up e-cigs in big numbers.  But they are still taking up smoking.

So if you knew you could stop, stop putting something in your mouth for comfort, stress relief or whatever else you do it for would you?

Well the good news is you can stop. You can stop smoking. Maybe you have conditioned yourself to fail. Maybe you've tried dozens of times to stop. Maybe you've been "trying" too hard. Maybe now is the time to stop "trying" and to just do it.

It is possible. You don't need a comforter. You just need to know how to become smoke free and e-cig free. Free. In control of your own life.

Call me!

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New year, new you? Or just the old you again?

Did you make any new year's resolutions?  Or didn't you bother in the end?

For most of setting new year's resolutions is a bit like reading a personal development book or going on a seminar. A week later life and work take over and we forget about the changes!

To make a change things have got to get too painful to stay the same!

But once we need to change what do we do? We go for BIG even MASSIVE change. And we fail don't we?

So this year why not change just one small thing?

Cut out one pudding a week. Drop one packet of crisps a week. Cut out one coffee a day. Make 6 packets of cigarettes last 7 days. Go for a five minute walk every day.

Prove to yourself that change is possible. Prove to yourself that change is easy. Prove to yourself that you can change.

Then when you're ready to make a big change you can make a really good New Year'sResolution:  Call Julie!

P.s My resolution is to blog more often!  Let's see how THAT goes!

So where does an 11 year old get the money for cigarettes?

New research says that the number of 11 to 16 year olds taking up smoking rose in 2011 to 207,000 from 157,000 in 2010.

When I put this on my facebook page the first comment I got was from a mum of 4. "Where does an 11 year old get the money for cigarettes? The answer I suppose is they pinched them from parents or older siblings or they pinched the money to buy some. Of it was their lunch money. (most of us did that, didn’t you?)

So isn't it illegal to sell cigarettes to under 18's? Yes it is - but still they get them!

But the question for me is why do kids still want to smoke knowing the damage it does? We all know someone who's suffering with the side effects of being a smoker - every child has seen someone with lung disease or cancer - if not someone they know, then someone on TV.

The answer is the same as it’s always been. It’s the answer that 95% of my stop smoking clients give. Peer pressure. Or as some people write on the questionnaire I give them "pier pressure" which conjures up a weird picture!

So what is peer pressure? It's our automatic response. The automatic response of human beings. We like to be liked. We like people who are like us. We like to join clubs. So whatever our age, when someone says "join us, we're having a good time" we join! OK not all of us – but a high percentage. And we’re more likely to join when we’re in our teens.

Most of my clients started smoking in their teens at school, at university or starting their first job. They did it because “everyone else was doing it”. Then they’re stuck. Even when “Everyone else” stops they carry on!

Teenagers have always seen “grown ups” smoking. So if you’re 14 how do you think you can look 16 or 18? Yes, do something that you have to be 16 (or now it’s 18) to do – smoke! Isn’t it the same with drinking?

Our parents do it, TV and pop stars do it – and we want to be like them!

I believe that the only way we will stop children smoking is to stop adults smoking. When TV “celebs” and pop stars take responsibility to say NO. To show youngsters that it isn’t “cool” to smoke (and drink to excess). Then we will see less young people starting to smoke.

When the government and NHS realise that they need to help people to stop smoking – not threaten them with ugly photos or blank packages. When everyone realises that they only failed to stop because they were trying methods that DON’T WORK. Then young people won’t want to smoke. There will be no point. If no-one else is doing it, if it’s not cool and doesn’t help stress (no, it really doesn’t) then there will be no point.

Until then I will be in a job. I will be helping people stop smoking. I fear that long after I am gone there will still be a need for someone to help people to stop smoking. Someone to help the 11 year olds of today when they are in their 40’s with the first signs of COPD, heart disease and cancer. How very sad.

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6 Things we Forgot about Sleeping

1. Every living thing needs to sleep.
2. Sleep is our body’s chance to repair and re-energise.
3. All living things have a body clock which is pre-set.
4. Human beings need about 6 – 8 hours sleep a night on average.
5. We cannot make ourselves sleep – force is the very opposite to sleep.

6. There can be physical, chemical and emotional reasons why me don’t sleep

All of these can be overcome because of point No.1: Every living thing needs to sleep.

So to be able to sleep “like a baby” you need to follow some simple rules, set up some new habits, follow a simple plan – and allow yourself to sleep.

I would like to share with you the answer! The simple rules to follow and a wonderful, relaxing, sleep inducing hypnosis!

If you're having problems sleeping give me a call.  You will, won't you?

Frightened? Thoughtless? Or just plain rude?

Have you ever missed an appointment – just completely forgotten about it absorbed in something else? We’ve probably all forgotten something – maybe a dentist or hygienist appointment, probably something important but not vital.

But what about those people who miss doctors' and hospital appointments? Those people who have an illness or serious problem then don’t turn up to get it sorted? Do they make you mad?

But why don’t they turn up? Is it because they genuinely forgot (possible) or changed their mind (well surely they’d cancel beforehand) or were just frightened of the prospect of the process or the outcome? Sometimes we need courage to do the things that we know we need to do, don't we?

I was out with a friend the other night who was telling me about arranging a minor knee operation. She’d told the doctor her holiday dates and asked for the referral to the specialist to avoid those dates. When she got home from her holiday there was a letter waiting for her – for an appointment a few days earlier! When she rang the hospital to re-arrange she said they were very sharp with her as she had “missed” her appointment. So either they hadn’t read the doctor’s referral properly – or the doctor had forgotten to give the holiday dates! Either way my friend became “the one that misses appointments” and when she finally got to see the specialist this is what he said to her “oh yes, you’re the one who missed her appointment.” As you can imagine she was upset and annoyed at the inference! She certainly wasn’t one of those people who just doesn’t turn up!

Last week I had a client who just didn’t turn up. She needed the appointment in that she needed to change some of her habits. She even confirmed the appointment by returning a questionnaire to me. Then she just didn’t turn up. She left me with a 90 minute wasted space in my diary. Other clients are coming next week who could have come to solve their problems earlier if she’d have cancelled earlier. But who has really lost out here? She has. She may have just decided not to bother – yet she really needs to make changes. She may have been frightened of the process or the outcome. Either way she has lost the opportunity to change. And I find that sad. Don’t you?  Sometimes we do need courage to change things that need to be changed!

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